What political rocket scientist developed the theory that gaping political wounds can be healed by repeated laying on of words? Exactly how many butt-numbing, head swiveling, TelePrompTer-read, yah da-dah da-dah da-dah daaahhh-paced regurgitations of speeches past, comprised of precisely how many empty words, are required to actually produce tangible results? Is there no limit to the number of excruciatingly boring repetitions of the same soup warmed over pre-empting our favorite television shows we are expected to endure? How many episodes of Andy Griffith Meets The Brady Bunch On Gilligan’s Island are we supposed to watch instead of the Pretendident Formerly Known As Present?
Are these “experts” really unaware that a given speaker’s effectiveness is diminished in inverse proportion to the number of times a helpless audience is subjected to him? Have they not yet been informed that entire villages of small countries have recently been known to abandon their homes and possessions in screaming terror when even a hint of the specter of the possibility that he might be considering maybe delivering another preachifying diatribe in prime time in any way enters their consciousness? Read the rest of this entry »
Obamboozlogandizing AstroTurf is the art of of spreading deodorized bullshit, aka, hopium laced KoolAid, to Sheeple, by preaching sanitized nonsense via the media and internet. The goal is to hoodwink said Sheeple, by any means necessary, into believing that whatever claptrap being offered is the fulfillment of an as yet unarticulated dream, satisfying a wish, or need, they may or may not have any idea they had, while doing the opposite, without getting one’s hands dirty.
Of course, this technique is not exactly novel; it is simply an amalgamation of many Sheeple herding tactics from history, gathered under one umbrella, and wielded by Baracko and the Obacolytes. Credit for the biggest block upon which this house of cards, smoke, and mirrors is built goes to Screamin’ Howie Dean, who, but for the shortsightedness of web cowboy Joe Trippi, might well be into his second term right now. You see, Dean Trippi’s shared Achilles heel was their inability to appreciate the vital necessity of The TelePrompTer for pretenditicians seeking higher office. Had Dr. Creeple People had a Trusty TelePrompTer of his very own, chances are the Edvard Munch impression he did would never have happened; and, if it had, he could simply have read a heartfelt, fratboy written, cliche-filled, hackneyed speech by rote the next day and been forgiven by all the teary-eyed bleeding hearts impressed with his Meetup fund raising innovation. Read the rest of this entry »
Just Barely President, Baracus Hubris Maximus, (Hail Ceasar!) forced the networks to give him a hunk of their prime time last night because…well, he really, really wanted to go on TV again. It wasn’t like he had anything earth-shattering, or even new, to share with the nation; he just must have felt, just like the rest of us did, that his last few giggly, insulting television appearances sucked, so he needed to hijack American Idol time to try to re-convince America that he was indeed worthy of their American Idol, West Wing-esque devotion to his Spokesmodel-In-Chief-iness. Whatever; Obi in HD is getting old.
As the past two years’ Interminable Campaign of the Candidate Then Known As Obamessiah morphs into the Perpetual Campaign of Just Barely President Baracus Hubris Maximus (Hail Ceasar!) great pains have been, and continue to be, taken to ensure that the Commander-in-Training always appears “presidential.” Who can forget the Multi-Flag Backdrop in Lieu of Lapel Pin constantly on display at the Incessant Inspirational Best Speeches Ever, brilliantly read by the eye-squinching, head swiveling, nose-in-the-air Teflon TelePrompTer Reader that we’ve all endured, often three, four, five times a day since 2006? Or, the Not Quite Presidential Great Seal of ObamaLand, employed during the general election and re-introduced with slight modifications during the “transition?”
Then, there was the summer’s Record Breaking Troop Avoiding Barackapalooza World B-Ball Exhibition Tour and LoveFest aboard the Almost Air Force One, allowing America to share it’s Superman/Savior with those Hopium-deprived humans doomed to reside outside our shores. Once the Hope Hypester’s predilection for “um, ah, ya know…” peppered, long winded, incomprehensible pontification, and inexplicable gaffes about geography (57 states) and religion (my Muslim faith) when off-script became too obvious to ignore, Pre-President Pinnochio’s PuppetMasters succumbed to the wisdom of having the Twin Traveling TelePrompTers umbilically connected to the Changeling’s Corpus, since surgical implantation is not yet a viable option.
For whatever reason, it seems our Too Too Yummy Presilicious is hellbent on being…difficultpetty somewhat of a jerk. Some of his recent moves are hard to understand. Like his announcement of Tim Kaine’s appointment as Chairman of the Democratic National Committee, carefully scheduled to occur while outgoing Chairman Howdy Doody Dean was otherwise occupied thousands of miles away doing party business, Secretary of State Hillary Clinton is being kept Elastic Man’s arm’s distance away from today’s Compromise on Health Care Summit. In fact, she’s being kept out of the debate, by everybody but the press, entirely.
This is by design of the Obacracy. No one associated with the Big Shot’s walk back from Universal Health Care is making any bones about it, either. Their flawed thinking is, the enduring stench from Clinton’s failed attempt at true health care reform is so permeative that nothing short of the stench of his new Health and Human Services Secretary’s failed attempts at health care reform can overcome it, and that’s only if Clinton is isolated in exile halfway around the world. Or something like that, according to David Axelrove, quoted in the New York Times:
“I think we’ve got her pretty well occupied,” said David Axelrod, Mr. Obama’s senior adviser, adding that the president and Mrs. Clinton had spoken about her experience with health care “only in the most general terms.”
The story for publication is that the Exalted One has learned from Clinton’s gross incompetence not to make the same egregious mistakes and doesn’t want her tainting the process of caving to insurance companies at the taxpayers’ expense. Or something like that:
In an interview, Mr. Emanuel described the White House effort, beginning with Thursday’s policy forum, as “the manifestation of a series of learned examples, learned lessons,” a litany of health policy do’s and don’ts. To begin with, the Clinton plan was drafted in secret and delivered to lawmakers as a fait accompli; Mr. Obama is articulating broad principles and leaving the details to Congress.
Since I don’t want health care reform, I want health care, I would appreciate Hillary Clinton’s hands-on input and influence based on hard won experience being a huge part of the mix. But, since Obama has been all over the place with his promises, depending upon who he’s talking to, one minute claiming to be a single payer proponent, the next, a “just keep what you got with a little something on the side,” insurance/drug industry suckophant, I can see where Clinton’s more committed participation might not be welcome. But, a less diplomatically challenged adult might have found a way to get that point across without slapping his potential ace-in-the-hole in the face in front of the world.
However, the White House’s tanned Beverly Hillbilly is obviously incapable of exhibiting even the barest semblance of decorum and grace, according to the British, via the snarky L.A. Times Top of the Ticket:
Some sensitive Brits, who recall that Brown dropped everything to provide that happy walking photo op during Obama’s European campaign swing last summer (see above), think that Obama, the son of a Kenyan whose homeland had a bloody colonial parting with Britain many years ago, meeting with Mexico’s president before his inauguration, traveling to Canada on his first foreign trip, having Japan’s prime minister over to the White House already, sending Hillary to Asia first, schmoozing with ex-PM Tony Blair at the National Prayer Breakfast, removing the Winston Churchill gift bust from the Oval Office and refusing to schedule a full-fledged side-by-side news conference with Brown that would look great on TV back home where Brown faces elections next year after the Brit was so effusive in his not-exactly-nonpartisan praise for Obama during the U.S. campaign is some kind of slight toward British leaders, who’ve been nothing but publicly stalwart toward the former American rebels for generations.
Is listening to Barack Obama read trite, repetitive speeches written by titty-groping frat boys from his ubiquitous Twin TelePrompTers a minimum of three times a day, like sex? Apparently, Republican strategist Alex Castellanos thinks so, since that’s what he said:
I think, as a friend told me once, that — listening to Barack Obama give a speech is like sex. The worse there ever was, was excellent.
To be perfectly honest, I feel the same way. Like bad sex, most of the time, the performance in no way lives up to the hype, there’s always the risk of dozing off in the middle of it, and I can’t wait to shower afterward. On second thought, bad sex is better; it never lasts nearly as long as either good sex, or an Obama speech.
The biggest myth to come out of the 2008 presidential campaign, besides Barack Obama himself, is that his bright, clean, “articulateness” makes him an O-rator Extraordinaire. Nothing could be further from the truth. The man is so inept as a speaker that he has to take a TelePrompTer into the shower to read a Cardboard Titty Groper-written request in case he runs out of shampoo. When off TelePrompTer, he bumbles, stumbles, mumbles, “ums,” “ahhhs,” and “ya knows” his way through incomprehensible moot points to their largely illogical conclusions. Not only is he not even passable as a public speaker, he is a barely competent public reader. His squinty-eyed, nose-in-the-air, head-swiveling is enough to give a person watching whiplash. That such inadequate performances as are his stock-in-trade have become celebrated examples of oratorical superiority is more of a testament to the determined application of the “skill” of the pervasive, sycophantic, Axelrod-extorted, ego-stroked, so-called mainstream media and blogosphere, recruited by the President’s Puppeteer to do his bidding, than to the “talent” of the Spokesmodel-in-Chief. In other words, as a public speaker, Obama sucks.
Dean Barnett, writing for the Weekly Standard, got on to Obama’s “secret” lack of inherent verbal ability after witnessing the Teflon TelePrompTer Reader performing in Virginia, sans crutch, in February of last year:
Shorn of his Teleprompter, we saw a different Obama. His delivery was halting and unsure. He looked down at his obviously copious notes every few seconds throughout the speech. Unlike the typical Obama oration where the words flow with unparalleled fluidity, he stumbled over his phrasing repeatedly.
Being Teflon, Obama’s inept speechifying wasn’t enough to cause even the conservative Barnett to overly critique his performance based on his all too obvious lack of speaking skills, it was the fact that when off-script, Obama reveals much more of his true personality than friend or foe would be comfortable with:
What makes Obama’s Jefferson-Jackson speech especially relevant is where he went when he went off script. The unifying Obama who has impressed so many people during this campaign season vanished, replaced by just another angry liberal railing against George W. Bush, Karl Rove, Exxon Mobil, and other long standing Democratic piñatas. The pressing question that Obama’s decidedly uninspiring Jefferson-Jackson oratory raises is which Obama is the real Obama–the one who read beautifully crafted words from a Teleprompter after his victory in Iowa, or the tediously angry liberal who improvised in Virginia?
With his Biden-esque tendency to gaffe (it’s a verb) about his Muslim faith in all 57 states, Knucklehead Smiff’s Shari Lewis (yeah, I know) realized the extent of the risk involved with continuing to allow his Frankenstienian creation loose on the campaign trail TelePrompTer-less, so the Puppet Master took the unprecedented step of sending Marble Mouth’s best friend on the road with him. From CNN, September, 2008:
It appears Barack Obama’s teleprompter is hitting the campaign trail.
The Democratic presidential nominee has never tried to hide the fact he delivers speeches off the device, though normally he doesn’t use one at standard campaign rallies and town hall events.
But the Illinois senator used a teleprompter at both his Colorado events Monday — making for a particularly peculiar scene in Pueblo, where the prompter was set up in the middle of what is normally a rodeo ring.
Now, according to the American Spectator, the Obamessiah’s performance was so lacking in his first press conference as president since the training wheels came off, even with his trusty prop, that Papa Smurf’n'Astroturf has patenalisticly provided his pride and joy with a podium mounted ‘PrompTer, so he’ll never have to speak alone:
To that end, he says, the White House is looking to install a small video or computer screen into the podium used by the president for press conferences and events in the White House. “It would make it easier for the comms guys to pass along information without being obvious about it,” says the adviser.
The screen would indicate whom to call on, seat placement for journalists, pass along notes or points to hit, and so forth, says the adviser.
Using a screen is nothing new for Obama; almost nothing he said in supposedly unscripted townhall events during the presidential campaign was unscripted, down to many of the questions and the answers to those questions. Teleprompter screens at the events scrolled not only his opening remarks, but also statistics and information he could use to answer questions.
The folks at SGW Teleprompter Solutions give many examples of services they offer, but, so far, no in-podium mounts. I wonder how long it will take the Obamaster to get the hang of using his new toy, since he’s barely gotten the hang of using the old one in the five years he’s had to adapt to it. Yep, according to this Chicago Magazine June, 2007 behind-the-scenes profile of Obuhbuh’s 2004 rock ‘em, sock ‘em reading debut at the Democratic National Convention, that was the first time he’d used one:
Obama, who prefers speaking extemporaneously, had no experience working with a teleprompter or addressing a group this loud and lively. Michael Sheehan, a Washington speech coach who advised Obama, says the prime-time convention speeches are “unexpectedly hard for several reasons: The noise is overwhelming, and on top of it, you’re speaking to three audiences at a time: the live audience; the big JumboTron in the convention hall; and to the TV cameras. It’s a juggling act.”
Obama struggled early on to master the mechanics of this new speaking environment. First, he had to train himself to read the words off the teleprompter screens without having it look or sound as if he were reading. He also had to adjust his speaking style. “There’s this impulse with these big, live speeches to orate as if you’re on a podium in the town square,” says Axelrod. “When you’re giving these speeches, you’re speaking not just to the crowd but primarily to a TV audience, and the microphone does all the work for you, so you don’t need to bellow.”
Good thing Big Daddy Axelrove was there to hold the handlebars as he took his maiden ride around the national political block, huh? I guess when you’re the first black Charlie McCarthy in the White House, it must be a tremendous comfort to know that the Candice Bergen’s dad hand up your back is only a glance left, down, and to the right away.
Like a lot of folks, I’ve had fun skewering That One’s prompter dependence in the past, and look forward to many more happy blogging hours in the future. ‘Til then, the wheels on the bus…
This is Barack Obama’s ventriloquist speechwriter kickin’ back and chilling wit’ his homey after a long day of putting words in his boss’ mouth via TelePrompTer. Favreau, recently announced to be Chief Official Thought Gatherer and “Um” Remover” for the new administration, was just hangin’ out, feeling up a cardboard cutout of the newly appointed Secretary of State; typical Saturday night wordsmith hijinks. Too bad this photo appeared on his Facebook page long enough for Al Kamen of the Washington Post to get hold of it:
Question No. 58 in the transition team vetting document for the Obama White House asks that applicants: “Please provide the URL address of any websites that feature you in either a personal or professional capacity (e.g. Facebook, My Space, etc.)”
Question No. 63 asks that applicants “please provide any other information … that could … be a possible source of embarrassment to you, your family, or the President-Elect.”
For a while there this afternoon, President-elect Barack Obama’s immensely talented chief speechwriter, 27-year-old Jon Favreau, might have been pondering how to address that question.
That’s when some interesting photos of a recent party he attended — including one where he’s dancing with a life-sized cardboard cut-out of secretary of state-designate Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton, and another where he’s placed his hand on the cardboard former first lady’s chest while a friend is offering her lips a beer — popped up on Facebook for about two hours. The photos were quickly taken down — along with every other photo Favreau had of himself on the popular social networking site, save for one profile headshot.
Guess not everybody on the TelePrompter Prince’s staff hates Hillary. At least Favreau didn’t call her a monster.
NOTE: I changed the title because PUMA Pac has the story up with the same title I had.
As I’m sure you are aware, one of the presidential candidates in this year’s election is inordinately fond of your product. While most politicians, actors, spokespersons and others in the public eye have occasion to make use of your products, there are those rather informal situations where it is preferable to project a more impromptu image. Let’s face it, sometimes a full TelePrompTer setup is impractical.
With that in mind, as well as the future of our country, I would like to suggest a few innovations you might consider. First, perhaps a collaboration with Apple might develop a new “iProd” or “iProne,” a hand held device with multiple capabilities, allowing a user, say, a politician, to have immediate, discrete online access to answers from his campaign headquarters during small gatherings. With such a device concealed in a breast pocket, and small, pocket-mirror sized screens placed discretely around the room, say, propped on the visor of an unsuspecting reporter’s baseball cap, such a politician need never be at a loss for an appropriate answer to an unexpected question. The magnified TelePrompTer script, with the addition of remote scrolling capabilities and a speakerphone function make the “iProne” far superior to anything currently available to a harried politician on-the-go.
(*If the snooty Apple people don’t go for it, try the snooty BlackBerry people. TeleBerry works just as well.)
Next, how about a marriage of TelePrompter and Ray Ban for fashionable question-and-answer assistance in stylish eyewear? Mounted inside the lenses like small mirrors, TeleBanTer would likely sell itself.
The same would be true of a merger between the capacities of your product with those of a hearing aide. MiraclePrompt would be ideal when visual screen access is restricted.
Finally, one never knows when a presidential candidate might be called upon to engage in negotiations of a more intimate nature for the good of his country, like they do in those political spy thrillers. On those occasions, proper equipment is a must. For more intimate engagements, TeleBraTor would give Cyrano de Bergerac-style instruction, as well as spur-of-the-moment interrogation techniques to an intrepid lover/undercover operative, while distracting an unsuspecting, yet potentially suspicious and dangerous partner with heretofore unknown levels of pleasure.
Please feel free to further explore these suggestions as soon as possible, if you would. No potential world-leader-wannabe dependent upon your products and services should ever be forced to face a hostile interview unprepared again. As I said earlier, the future of the free world, nay, the entire universe, could depend on it.
Three days ago, CNN announced that Barack Obama was taking his TelePrompTer on the road. People, including me, scoffed. How could anyone take a candidate seriously who suddenly needs such a device to deliver a 2 year old stump speech? (If you don’t count the first variation delivered at the 2004 Democratic convention.) Yet, it seems that, once again, Campaigner Extraordinaire has prevailed and proven himself Master Wizard In Chief.
Sept. 15, the day of the Monumental TelePrompTer Announcement, Rasmussen Reports had John McCain up 2 points. Today, the two candidates are tied. Gallup has Obama +4, but on the 15th, they were virtually even. Coincidence? I think not. AP attributes Obama’s recent “surge” in the polls to a number of factors, chiefly the candidates’ response to our recent economic crisis. AFP via Yahoo News, reaches similar conclusions regarding the across-the-board reversion to pre-convention polling levels. However, since neither candidate seems to have much of a handle on the problem, I’m not so sure.
No, I’m convinced it was the novel, strategic inclusion of the groundbreaking TelePrompTer-On-The-Campaign-Trail tactic that did it. What vision! What leadership! Recognize a potentially disastrous problem and take action to fix it! No more “57 states!” No more “lipsticked (stuck?) pigs!” That’s what we need in a president. Problem solving. Though…
Obama, on the trail in New Mexico, had this to say of McCain:
“And today he accused me of not supporting what the Treasury and the Federal Reserve Bank did with AIG despite no evidence whatsoever that that’s what I had said.”
To recap, when I wrote earlier today that Obama supported the bailout, I quickly was instructed by his staff that this was not the case. He just didn’t oppose it, I was told.
Now he’s so adamant about not opposing the Fed’s move that he’s complaining about McCain’s portrayal.
Where, I wonder, is the line between not opposing and, ya know, supporting.
Got a feeling there might be a couple of used TelePrompTers for sale by the Obama camp in the near future. That is, if those polls don’t hold.
Many a Barack Obama supporter is likely to face rejection on a grand scale, not to mention increased potential for a good, old-fashioned beatdown, if they do what Obama tells them to do. At a TelePrompTed rally in Elko, Nevada yesterday, the good senator ended his scripted remarks by encouraging people to “get in the faces” of their neighbors and friends and make his case for him.
This seems to me to be a very bad idea. Personally, I loathe Senator Obama and all he stands for, and I’m a black (former) Democrat. You’d think that I would be ripe for persuasion since I “fit the demographic,” but you would be very, very wrong. The very idea of someone, anyone, getting in my face about why I should support Mr. “I Can Barely Win Even When All The Big Shots In My Party Cheat For Me” Obama makes a large vein somewhere in the vicinity of my left eye start to twitch, causing me to squint uncontrollably. It’s happening right now, and the attendant fist clenching, shortness of breath and increased heartrate make it difficult to finish this post.
How dare he say something like this with a straight face? All of his other gaffes have been excused and explained away by the fact that he didn’t have a TelePrompTer handy. The fact that this is a monumentally lame excuse in the first place is not important, I’ll just concede the point that while such a deficiency in any other candidate would be grounds for disqualification as a contender, it is perfectly acceptable as a justification for any St. Obama misspeak. But he had a TelePrompTer here. Let’s even pretend that a TelePrompter for a political candidate at an outdoor rally in a baseball stadium is the norm, there’s still no excuse for irresponsibly inciting people who aren’t even there to violence.
Obamaniacs are obnoxious enough as it is. The last thing they need is permission from their “Dear Leader” to be moreso. Even non-confrontational ones, like the guy in the following video, make you want to smack them upside the head repeatedly, with enthusiasm, like Desi Arnaz playing “Babalu.” This guy thinks it’s cute to vent his wrath at a McCain supporter he overheard at the Post Office. Nevermind the fact that he was eavesdropping, what’s striking is, the man this guy is so offended by was obviously so intimidating that running home and making a snarky video was seen to be the most attractive option available. Maybe instead of making a You Tube video, he should have watched Obama’s You Tube video so he could learn from The Most Obie On-High that the proper thing to do was “get in Post Office Man’s face.” I’m sure whatever offering Video Guy put out after he recovered would have been lots more entertaining and interesting.
“They’re going to try to tell you John McCain is good, but you’re smarter than that. After eight years of George Bush, you know we can’t afford another white guy. George Bush is bad. John McCain knows George Bush personally. That makes John McCain bad.
But you know that. Even though your lives suck because you’ve got no money, because there are no jobs available, and when you do work, your taxes are too high, and if you get sick, you’re probably gonna die because George Bush won’t give you health insurance, and John McCain knows George Bush. You deserve health insurance. But Washington doesn’t work that way. George Bush doesn’t work that way. And John McCain knows George Bush 90% of the time.
That’s why it’s time to change. We don’t need 8 to 10 more years of the same old policies we’ve had under George Bush. We need to change. John McCain is not going to change Washington, he’s been there 26 years. We need a new direction, we need hope. Now is the time for a different way of doing things. Can we really afford more of the same? Now is the time for change. Now is the time for hope.
But we can’t just hope to end the war. We’re fighting 2 wars, and John McCain says that’s okay. He wants to fight George Bush’s war for the next 100 years. But you know better. You can’t keep fighting the wrong war, the dumb war. I’ve been against this war from the beginning, and when I’m president I will end this war. But not the other one. After eight years of George Bush’s failed policies, we know John McCain won’t. He wants to raise your taxes. He doesn’t get it. He can’t use a computer. He’s really old. That’s why the special interests that run Washington want John McCain, but we can’t afford 4 more years of the same old thing.
Now is the time for you to tell Washington that you want change. Send a message to the special interests that they can no longer expect business as usual. Tell them it’s time for a black man. With your help, I will fix Washington, I will say “no” to the special interests, I will end this war, I will always work for you, the middle class, the little guy. I’m not like the other presidents. I’ve got a funny name. But I love my country too much to let you hold that against me. I believe the time is now. I believe we need to change. I believe we can do better than four more years of the same old George Bush policies John McCain wants. But it starts with you. If you have hope, we can change. Do you want change? Do you like hope? Then vote for me, because I’m not the other guy.”
I was going to try to write up that speech interpretation as it might be delivered sans TelePrompTer, but after only a few moments of typing, I could no longer bear the excruciating pain of trying to actually read what I was writing, nor could I see clearly through the tears. Plus, my head was really starting to…uh…umm…well…hurt. So maybe that’s not an exact transcription, but it’s what his speeches, ads and news stories sound like to me. Or, should I say, sounded like. The only time I hear him speak nowadays is when unwittingly duped into visiting undercover Obots masquerading as “friends” and forced to listen to Obi-Wan-NaBePresident against my will. On those increasingly rare occasions, I’ve learned to put something crunchy in my mouth and chew loudly, even if it annoys my hosts and their guests, since I have also learned that such behavior is preferable to them than having me put my fingers in my ears and make loud “la-la” noises. I’ll admit, I’ve learned not to even try to listen closely for fear that doing so will make my eyes glaze over as I grind my teeth to a powder while my ears begin to bleed copiously, and I really don’t like it when that happens.
It appears Barack Obama’s teleprompter is hitting the campaign trail.
The Democratic presidential nominee has never tried to hide the fact he delivers speeches off the device, though normally he doesn’t use one at standard campaign rallies and town hall events.
But the Illinois senator used a teleprompter at both his Colorado events Monday — making for a particularly peculiar scene in Pueblo, where the prompter was set up in the middle of what is normally a rodeo ring.
Makes you wonder, though, how come these political geniuses didn’t come up with this after “57 states” and before “lipstick on a pig” if they’re so damned smart?
What’s next, lip-syncing speeches to track?
Then he could be Milli Vanilliand a modern day Paladin.
*Check out the great snark on Obama’s economic response originally posted on his website.
What political rocket scientist developed the theory that gaping political wounds can be healed by repeated laying on of words? Exactly how many butt-numbing, head swiveling, TelePrompTer-read, yah da-dah da-dah da-dah daaahhh-paced regurgitations of speeches past, comprised of precisely how many empty words, are required to actually produce tangible results? Is there no limit to 
the number of excruciatingly boring repetitions of the same soup warmed over pre-empting our favorite television shows we are expected to endure? How many episodes of Andy Griffith Meets The Brady Bunch On Gilligan’s Island are we supposed to watch instead of the Pretendident Formerly Known As Present?
diminished in inverse proportion to the number of times a helpless audience
is subjected to him? Have they not yet been informed that entire villages of small countries have recently been known to abandon their homes and possessions in screaming terror when even a hint of the specter of the possibility that he might be considering maybe delivering another preachifying diatribe in prime time in any way enters their consciousness? Read the rest of this entry »
Obamboozlogandizing AstroTurf is the art of of spreading deodorized bullshit, aka, hopium laced KoolAid, to Sheeple, by preaching sanitized nonsense via the media and internet. The goal is to hoodwink said Sheeple, by any means necessary, into believing that whatever claptrap being offered is the fulfillment of an as yet unarticulated dream, satisfying a wish, or need, they may or may not have any idea they had, while doing the opposite, without getting one’s hands dirty.
Just Barely President, Baracus Hubris Maximus, (Hail Ceasar!) forced the networks to give him a hunk of their prime time last night because…well, he really, really wanted to go on TV again. It wasn’t like he had anything earth-shattering, or even new, to share with the nation; he just must have felt, just like the rest of us did, that his last few 
As the past two years’ Interminable Campaign of the Candidate Then Known As Obamessiah morphs into the Perpetual Campaign of Just Barely President Baracus Hubris Maximus (Hail Ceasar!) great pains have been, and continue to be, taken to ensure that the Commander-in-Training always appears “presidential.” Who can forget the Multi-Flag Backdrop in Lieu of Lapel Pin constantly on display at the Incessant Inspirational Best Speeches Ever, brilliantly read by the eye-squinching, head swiveling, nose-in-the-air Teflon TelePrompTer Reader that we’ve all endured, often three, four, five times a day since 2006? Or, the Not Quite Presidential 
For whatever reason, it seems our Too Too Yummy Presilicious is hellbent on being…
Is listening to Barack Obama read trite, repetitive speeches written by titty-groping frat boys from his ubiquitous Twin TelePrompTers a minimum of three times a day, like sex? 
