Somebody Better Call Pat And Vanna

Quick!  Somebody get  Pat and Vanna on the phone, stat!  The Obamaniacs desperately need to buy a clue!

Answer:  Clueless in the White House.

Question:  What is the constant state of the Obama administration, Alex?

Alex:  You are correct.  Pick again.

Though many of us have known all along that Barry and the Bus Drivers never had any idea what the hell they were doing, a quick perusal of the weekend news round-up proves that despite Obie’s delusion that he was actually, at least navigating his “historic” course to the Nobel Prize, if not driving his custom, tricked out, re-built, rented GM Fishbowl, and owed his current position to his own aptitude and the acumen of his pit crew, nothing could be further from the truth.  No, a careful reading of the “tidbits” contained in David Plouffe!-There-He Goes!’s upcoming tell-nothing-cuz-he-don’t-know-shit “expose” of the behind the scenes machinations of the Axelrovians, Audacity To Win, proves that whoever is responsible for the front man status of the Spokesmodel-in-Chief, it ain’t none o’ these clowns.

According to CNN, reporting on excerpts of the book now running in Time Magazine, Obombo was seriously considering nominating Hillary Clinton as vice-president, unbeknownst to Double David, both of whom were absolutely horrified about the prospect, horrified, I tellya! and thus, majorly relieved when Obie came to the conclusion, all by his lonesome, mind you, that he was too shy about exposing his potentially shriveled-looking, at least one short huevos in a political threesome with Billary to ask his Dream Girl out.

“Obama was clearly thinking more seriously about picking Hillary Clinton than Axelrod and I had realized,” Plouffe writes. “He said if his central criterion measured who could be the best VP, she had to be included in that list.”

While Obama continued to consider picking Clinton throughout the summer of 2008, he ultimately eliminated her name from the list in early August, fearing, Plouffe writes, that there “were just too many complications outweighing the potential strengths.”

“I think Bill may be too big a complication,” Plouffe quotes Obama as saying. “If I picked her, my concern is that there would be more than two of us in the relationship.”

Plouffe!Where’dHeGo? also revealed that they had no clue what to do about the “Palin Problem,” and the dust-up over “Uncle Jerry” took them totally by surprise.   The fourth wheel of the White House’s very own Rahmbo/Carville/Begala early morning phonesklatch and news pipeline, ABC’’s Georgie-boy Snuffleupagus, reveals 10 Amazing Insights to Ineptitude, leading off with this juicy turd nugget; whoever teamed Double David with Barack Whosayin’ YoMama neglected to provide an affidavit or dossier:

Plouffe writes, “ …we had done zero research on our own candidate beyond a small and incomplete package from the 2004 Senate race.  With this lapse, we were violating a central rule of politics – know more about yourself than your opponents and the media do.  Since we had not scrubbed every quote, vote, speech, and donor of Obama’s, we knew we’d be getting questions we couldn’t foresee, unless he remembered each incident and vote precisely, we’d be scrambling to mount a defense.”

You would think that political strategists of the supposed caliber of the Two Davids would have had fool sense enough to research the guy they were being paid to guide to the White House, now wouldn’t you?  The fact that they did not, and admit it, conjures up images of Deep Throat and “just following orders” to me.  Whoever was pulling these Marionettes’ strings and manipulating their Muppet arms, Plouffe!UpInSmoke’s revelations are compelling evidence of their existence, while serving as a testament to Little Davey’s determination to keep their identity on not-so-deep background.

In other “y’all really think we’re stupid” news, the Obministration released a bunch of “who really were those masked men?” names of  White House visitors who really weren’t those people, as an example of Obama Transparency response, which obviously is akin to “brown and white makes mud clear.”  Among the union bosses, bailout bankster buddies, (can you say Chicago friend, Jamie Dimon? the guy?) Hollywoodsters, string pullers, pew pimps, and feminists, the names Bill Ayers and Jeremiah Wright appear on White House logs.  However, all is not as it seems, apparently.  First of all, only people who were asked about on Whitehouse.gov. were talked about by anybody associated with the White House, and second, there are obviously many, many people named Bill Ayers and Rev. Jeremiah Wright with access to the Pretendident.  In fact, the most interesting question raised, in my mind, concerns whether ousted NOW president Kim Gandy’s “more than a dozen” visit infatuation with the Feminist-in-Chief might have been slightly more productive than otherwise credited.  From the Washington Post:

In mid-February, as Obama stumped for, and then signed, a stimulus bill, he met several times with labor boss Andy Stern. In about the same period, Obama met twice with Jamie Dimon, the head of JPMorgan Chase. On May 26, National Organization for Women President Kim Gandy was in the audience when Obama introduced court nominee Sonia Sotomayor.

[edit]

The list of 481 records, covering the first six months of the Obama presidency, is far from a comprehensive record of who met with the president and his top staff members. Aides said they released records for only those visitors about whom a specific request was made on the Whitehouse.gov Web site since last month.

The results are sometimes comical, as people whose names resembled the famous — and infamous — forced the West Wing to wave reporters away from the juiciest of apparent visits. Did ’60s radical William Ayers, the Rev. Jeremiah Wright and filmmaker Michael Moore all visit the Obama White House, as the list indicated? Aides were quick to say: It wasn’t that Bill Ayers, Jeremiah Wright or Michael Moore, although more details about the identities of the real visitors were not provided.

But, yes, officials said, the Oprah on the list really is Oprah Winfrey, and one of the Serenas listed really is tennis player Serena Williams.

Ummm-hmmm…anyway, moving on.  In what amounts to a mini-revolt of sorts, Obama’s psuedo-journalistic suckophant network, MSNBO, is covering an Associated Press article claiming that the public option is a typical Obministration sham scam, and its online mag-arm, Slate is selling pot, gay marriage, and trips to Cuba because the time, having nothing to do with Obafenokee, for those things has come.  Say what?  I thought the sun shone rainbows because Obama peed outside, according to these guys.  Wha’ happun?

In other news, as the Most Happily Married Black Presentident And His Slave Descended Wife Evah did Halloween, she dressed as Eartha Kitt, he as President Around The House, the Republican party was happily shooting itself in the balls and lap dancing for joy.  While description-defying Michele Bachmann was busy channeling Michael Jackson and fronting for Americans For Prosperity trying to rally support for her/their “fuck healthcare” rally, and her galpal Sarah was being said by Glenn Beck to be positioning herself for a 3rd-party presidential run by forcing moderates out of the Republican party, delighting some, outmaneuvered left-leaning Republican candidate Dede Scozzafava was giving them all a heartfelt va fungool (?)by endorsing the Democrat in her former race.  I tell you what, if I ever make good my own imagined threat and start a Femocratic Party, Michele and Sarah are banned for life, but Dede’s in like Flynn.

While I’m sure my dreams of founding a woman-centric political party will remain just that, one of my other fantasies is that if I was a right and proper medieval queen, these two scumsuckers would be heading off to not pass “Go” on their way to OffWithTheirHeadsVille.

And, finally, if you really want to read a juicy expose, Tim Donaghy, the Gambling Referee’s tell-more-than-you-really-wanna-know tome, Blowing The Whistle, should do the trick.  Just don’t read it, or the linked excerpts, if you’re an NBA fan and want to stay that way.  Creep.

And…the munkeyhumpin’ wheels keep doin’ what they do over all the people they usually do it over, old and new.