Obama – Performer, Not Reformer

No lobbyists!  Change Washington!  The old ways must go! Blah, blah, blah.   The Spokesmodel-In-Chief, Black Obama, has used, and, continues to use,  these and other similar rah-rah phrases as his stock-in-trade bamboozle shtick, reading variations of them from cards and TelePrompTers, ad nauseum, throughout his national career, riding them to the White House like a gangster rapper in a pimped out Escalade,(or a good old boy in a cherry F-350, or a bailed out executive in a fully appointed private jet, or…you get the idea).  And, to paraphrase Steely Dan, the poor people keep sleeping with the shade on the light; dreaming they’re awake, participating, and even (giggle) making a difference.

Have a house party and talk about me! Play poker with Obama playing cards, use Obama coins for chips! Read my quotes in your little blue Pocket Obama books while wearing your official Obama drawers, panties, and sneakers!  Tell me what you would do if you were me!  Pay no attention to what I’m doing behind this curtain, how I spend your money is my business! And, the(L)Obotomized sheeple gleefully dip into their meager financial reserves, toddle off to Smart ‘n Final for mega-sized Tubs O’ Treats so they can stimulate themselves and other like-minded Obots into a frenzy over the fact that the Mean Ol’ Republicans won’t help their Obamessiah screw the people exactly the way he wants to.  Boo fucking hoo.

While the Great and Powerful Odd transforms Washington into a new, improved model of the Same Old Shit (copyright pending) the nation’s attention is skillfully diverted by the spectacle of the masterful artistry of the Wizard’s prestidigitation skills while tap dancing.  And, indeed, it is a wonder to behold.  For, the man who swore that lobbyists would have no place in his shiny new, bright, clean, articulate, transparent Washington is not-so-quietly assembling a team of cheats, liars, and (horrors!) lobbyists, right in front of your face.  Par-tay!

Faced with the J. Edgar Hoover-like 7 page vetting questionnaire cabinet appointees were required to fill out, New Mexico Governor and Commerce Secretary-designate, Bill Richardson decided to cut and run, getting the hell out of Dodge before anybody could turn his pay-to-play allegations into a Blagojevich-type full-fledged media assault and impeachment.

Turbo Tax Cheat Timothy (Ooops!) Geithner revealed to Transition Team O that he had made a bunch of “innocent mistakes” on his own taxes as he was about to be confirmed as the country’s Treasury Secretary and overseer of the Internal Revenue Service.  No mind, they were Turbo Tax’s fault, and he made good, so no sweat.  Besides, Oboyi’mpresident really likes him ‘cuz he’s the only one, in the whole wide world, who can lead us out of the financial crisis he helped put us in.  Duh.

Two days after proclaiming from on high that lobbyists would have no place, get it, no place, I tellya, in his administration, Obiteme quietly put out the “except for” word on one guy, and then snuck a whole buncha more guys in while the door was open.  Sssshhhhhh!

The latest O’Kerfluffle combines all the elements of the classic O’Drama, lobbying and tax cheating and other stuff, oh, my!  Tom Daschle, Obuhbuh’s pick for Secretary of Health and Human Services, is going to work in a similar capacity in the Obama administration whether his newly revealed tax troubles prevent him from being confirmed or not, since he’s also been tapped as Director of the White House Office of Health Reform for backup.  Daschle, the “consultant” for lobbyists who suddenly remembered he had tax issues, is married to a lobbyist, and is himself being lobbied by health care groups who have paid him money in the past.  Gotta cover all those bases, right?  From Politico:

Tom Daschle, tapped to be President Obama’s health czar, was paid more than $200,000 by the health-care industry in the past two years, according to documents obtained by Politico.

The former Senate majority leader, who gave speeches to firms and groups with a vested-interest in the administration’s upcoming health reform, collected the checks as part of a $5 million windfall after he lost reelection to his South Dakota seat.

This weekend, Daschle’s nomination to be secretary of Health and Human Services became embroiled in controversy over the last-minute revelation that he had only recently paid long-overdue taxes.

Daschle also “forgot” to report on his taxes that somebody paid him more than most people make in a whole year, according to the Associated Press:

Daschle also had unreported consulting income of $88,333, in 2007. He also had reductions to charitable contributions totaling about $15,000 over the three years covered, according to the Senate Finance Committee document. The document, marked “Confidential Draft,” is a committee statement concerning Daschle’s nomination.

No worries.  Our new Twinkletoes the Magnificent president just waved his magic wand (issued a statement) that made the appearence of impropriety go away, just like he did for Turbo Tax Timmy:

White House spokesman Bill Burton said Daschle’s role in the new Obama administration was not in danger.

“The president has confidence that Sen. Daschle is the right person to lead the fight for health care reform,” Burton said. “In preparation for his nomination, Sen. Daschle and his accountant identified some tax issues and fixed them. They filed amended return with the IRS and made payments with interest.”

Ah, well, it’s a good show.  At least we know that with the continued early morning daily Axelrod approved Astroturf talking points delivery to CNN’s James Carville and Paul Begala, direct from the White House via Rahm Emanuel, we’ll get the Michael Jackson-in-his-heyday quality spin we’ve grown accustomed to.  And, if you’re on the official Obie sucker donor list, you, too, can give a stimulating stimulus party to celebrate how the wheels on the bus go bumpety, bumpety bump all over the people under it.