From what I can tell from surfing the internet daily about Barack Obama for the last two years, a large number a significant segment quite a few some people are absolutely convinced that the circumstances of The Sheeple’s Choice’s birth render him unqualified to be president. Contrarily, most of these folks do not believe the Teflon TelePrompTer Messiah is an alien, or was hatched from an egg or a pod, or even born in a manger, (which would make the job of president a real demotion, imho) or that he is not a citizen, but rather that he is not a “natural born” citizen as required by the Constitution, that old, dated document a lot of other folks seem to want to burn and start over, but that’s another subject.
Anyway, a lot bunch couple of people think that the “natural born” thing is pretty important, and that the Certificate of Live Birth the new King of Kings of the World posted all over the internet as proof that he’s not an alien pod-person would be a load of hooey even if it wasn’t PhotoShopped. “Where’s the regular, long form birth certificate with the doctor’s name and hospital and baby’s weight and footprint on it, huh?” they ask in rare moments of lucidity. “And, anyway, so what,” they say when they get a roll going, “you even said yourself your dad was a British citizen when you were born, and Hawaii wasn’t even barely a state at that time, and, on top of that, we’re not even sure who your dad really is, a lot of black guys went to Hawaii back then, there’re military bases there and plus, it’s warm, you know, and we heard your mom put out and got around, maybe even to Kenya, so how do we know you’re not Nat “King” Cole or Patrice Lumumba’s kid or something? And, anyway, aren’t you adopted?” This is a pretty rowdy bunch of theorists who can really think outside the box due to their natural KoolAid buzz aversion once the Twinkie rush wears off.
Now, as far as I’m concerned, “natural born” can mean a lot of things, like, delivered without drugs, or not breech, or non-Ceasarean, or casually dropped in a field by a working mother with no health insurance or accumulated sick time, or hundreds of other things (I don’t drink KoolAid, either, btw, and I’m all out of Twinkies, fyi.) Personally, I believe Obama was created in a lab by David Axelrod from randomly accumulated scraps surreptitiously purloined over the decades from dead presidents and other smart, famous guys, and assembled on Astroturf through the miracle of secret, early stem cell and DNA technology, cleverly hidden over the years on a prototypical database by the parents of the guy who invented Google, but, that’s just my guess.
Anyway, it looks like we’re all wrong; according to this website, there is an official birth certificate here. Shucks, and I just bought a brand new roll of tin foil and a book on millinery.
“When Barack Obama Jr. was born on Aug. 4,1961, in Honolulu, Kenya was a British colony, still part of the United Kingdom’s dwindling empire. As a Kenyan native, Barack Obama Sr. was a British subject whose citizenship status was governed by The British Nationality Act of 1948. That same act governed the status of Obama Sr.‘s children.
Since Sen. Obama has neither renounced his U.S. citizenship nor sworn an oath of allegiance to Kenya, his Kenyan citizenship automatically expired on Aug. 4,1982.”
[...] Internet rumors about Obama’s citizenship” have to do with anything? We all know the truth about the Pineapple President’s birth certificate issues by now, don’t [...]
Hey Cinie,
I sure needed a good laugh — thanks!!
Sadly, this is probably the best unkept secret of the century — sort of like Who Framed Roger Rabbit? and Who Shot JR? The only reason this issue will never be taken seriously is the big black eye of embarrassment it would cause the U.S. on the world stage. Like that’s the only thing we’ve done way wrong in the last decade?
Anyway — thanks!
MESSAGE TO EVERY MEMBER OF CONGRESS:
When counting the electoral votes, either Congress finds by 1/8/09 that Obama, not being an Article II “natural born citizen”, fails to qualify as President whereupon Biden becomes the full fledged President under 3 USC 19 (free to pick his own VP such as Hillary) or thereafter defers to the Supreme Court to enjoin Obama’s inauguration with Biden becoming only Acting President under the 20th Amendment until a new President is duly determined.
The preferable choice, at least for the Democrats, should seem obvious.
That BC should be good enough for the MCM and the DNC. It’s on a par with everything else they’ve shoved forward as proof of O’s legitimacy.
There was a comment a while back following a CBC on-line news article that quoted an obscure section of U.S. code addressing this issue. It was something to the effect that if O’s parents were legitimately married, then O’s status as an American citizen would be in trouble. If his parents were not legally married, then he actually would be a citizen. The comment added that the section of code has been revised since then, but would be the governing law for the time O was born.
I didn’t save the quote – at the time it seemed impossible that this impostor could get anywhere near the presidency. If true, it could explain why no believable birth certificate has come to light.
It puts O in a pickle – if he proves his legitimacy as to citizenship, he also has to claim his illegitimacy as to birth. Given his campaign’s trademark sexism, I have no doubt he’s perfectly comfortable with a term that punishes children first, women second and men not at all – he just doesn’t want it added to HIS list of historic presidential “firsts”.
Hitler had an old arrest for male prostitution that never saw the light of day. The professionally devious have ways of preventing stuff from appearing.
Who cares about his past? He gives one hell of a speech, and that’s good enough for me! (Obama, I mean.)
Hey Major Paine check this link out! http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Natural-born_citizen
According to that, to be a “natural born citizen” both parents must be American citizens. Last I checked Kenya isn’t in the U.S.. So yes, he is an American citizen, but not a “natural born citizen”, there’s a difference. Keep trying.
[...] namely The Absurd Report, has found the Obambi’s COLB… Ya’ can take off those tin foil hats [...]
OMG! That is absolutely divine! I needed that guffaw! You go! Great BC!
I like the crayons. Makes it look more authentic than anything I have seen on the web, yet……….
Good advice Thom. Thanks for your final comment.
who gives a crap… he was born in America, so he can be president of America. end of story. move to your next conspiracy theory.
Ah, Thomas, but can you be “natural born” with dual citizenship?
you are fools.
grow up.
Obama was born on American soil, so he is an American citizen.
grow up.
Auntie Lib, thanks for the link, but just to be clear, the text is mine, the b.c. came from The Absurd Report.
Challenge, can anyone prove this wrong?:–
1. Constitution Article II requires USA President to be “natural born citizen”.
2. BHO’s website admits his dad was Kenyan/British, not American, citizen when BHO was born.
3. BHO is therefore not a “natural born citizen” (irrespective of Hawaiian birth or whether he may be a 14th Amendment “citizen” of USA) — as confirmed in the Senate’s own McCain qualification resolution agreed to by BHO.
4. Supreme Court has already docketed two upcoming conferences, 1/9/09 and 1/16/09 — between dates Congress counts electoral votes (1/8/09) and Presidential inauguration (1/20/09) — to address Berg Case and fashion relief on BHO’s eligibility to be President.
5. Since no facts are in dispute, Supreme Court rules on Summary Judgment to enjoin BHO’s inauguration as President.
6. Therefore, BHO is not inaugurated as President.
7. Vice President Elect Biden is inaugurated Acting President under the 20th Amendment to serve until new President is determined — the procedure for which determination to be set out by Congress and/or the Supreme Court so long as in conformance with the Constitution.
What a hoot! This made my day. I just found this blog from a referral at HillBuzz – it’s going on my list of favorites. You’re welcome to visit me anytime. I’ve linked to this post – hope that’s ok with you.
[...] here or here for more on this exciting revelation. If nothing else, you’ll find yourself cracking [...]
Hi, raGing, welcome and thanks for the compliment, but I must give credit where credit is due, The b.c. comes from The Absurd Report.
http://www.theabsurdreport.com/2008/final-word-on-obamas-birth-certificate/
the notorious Cinie from Sugar’s blog. your pretty good with crayons girl!
Oh ROFL! I’m dying here!
I really cannot imagine a 17 year old white girl in 1961 jumping on a plane while pregnant and flying back to Kenya to have a baby! That said, I have doubts that she even Married Obama Sr. There is not Marriage License or Divorce Records (yet). So perhaps that is the embarrassing thing the Obama doesn’t want surfaced. Based on Obama Sr. Treatment of Obama and his mother I suspect this was just a fling or worse a one-night stand for Obama Sr. He probably did not even want his name on the BC. His wife in Kenya may not have liked that idea very much (I don’t think Ann was a Morman either). Is a marriage legal if you are already married? Also what would Obama’s legal name be if his mother was not really married? Also what would his legal name be if he was legally adopted by his step -father? It looks like he may have optionally used a lot of different names, so you got to wonder about that issue. Maybe thats why he is hiding all his documents. I don’t think anyone really properly vetted Obama. How could they? All his documents have been sealed, preventing a proper vetting. This makes me feel that this election was fradulant!
Hi, Kara, welcome, I’m happy you found me, too!
Myiq, who verifies? The Secretary of each state? The DeaNC? Whose word are we supposed to take? I dunno, with Obie’s fondness for finding legal loopholes to screw, it doesn’t seem out of the realm of possibility that something’s fishy. That being said, I’m more inclined to believe that the long form birth certificate has some info he finds personally embarrassing than that it disqualifies him.
And, very few jobs require a B.C. as some kind of guarantee that you’ll show up to work.
The last time I needed to show mine was for a driver’s license, and you don’t gotta be “natural born” to get one of those.
Cinie:
I try to keep an open mind, but I want to see evidence.
I would think anyone running for President would be required to submit proof of eligibility along with their other documents.
When you apply for a real job you have to submit proof you are legally here.
Cinie,
You are hilarious! Oh man, I am sooo happy I found this blog.
Loved all of it, but especially the satire and the various definitions of natural born…
“…so how do we know you’re not Nat “King” Cole or Patrice Lumumba’s kid or something?”
Gosh what a great laugh! Thanks for that. At this point, I’d say we’d all just better brace ourselves….for anything.
Myiq, I take no position re: the COLB thing, more correctly, I take both positions, er, see, I could go this way….or, I could go that way…
Anyway, Axelborg is a perfect ventriloquist to give his hologram of a puppet life.
“I kinda wonder why he bothers people anyway if he has his own blog.”
I’m gonna go out on a limb and guess “loneliness.”
As for the other, I have yet to see anything except wild and unsupported speculation on the COLB/Birth certificate tin foil hat fad.
If Obama was born in Hawaii, he is a naturalized citizen no matter where his parents are from.
I’ve seen theories that he was born in Canada or Kenya but not a shred of evidence to back it up.
Axelrod, on the other hand, is a cyborg.
Thanks, HT, but I don’t think Major Paine will be bothering us much anymore. I kinda wonder why he bothers people anyway if he has his own blog.
Interesting how so many folks who are historically challenged, choose historical figures as their screen names. I suppose that it is a bagatelle, however, it does have “freudian” implications, in that the person taking on the name (not necessarily the persona) is attempting to add legitimacy to that person’s opinions, which ordinarily would be ignored.
Cinie, your response was A+.
Thomas, perhaps before you comment, you should learn how to read. Next time that knee of your tingly leg jerks, do us all a favor and ignore it. We promise to ignore you, too.
*psychotic
not like you half-wits would probably have noticed
talk about examples of neo-conservative phycotic thinking….
did you even read the title of your post?
Was Obama Really Born?
hmm….. let me think about that for a second….
Cinie, you kill me! I love that COLB…it’s so realistic. Thank you from a gut wrenching guffaw.
ROADMAP TO ADDRESS THE LOOMING CONSTITUTIONAL CRISIS:
Since the Supreme Court has now prevented itself from acknowledging the question of whether Barack H. Obama is or is not an Article II “natural born citizen” based on the Kenyan/British citizenship of Barack Obama’s father at the time of his birth (irrespective of whether Barack Obama is deemed a “citizen” born in Hawaii or otherwise) as a prerequisite to qualifying to serve as President of the United States under the Constitution — the Court having done so at least three times and counting, first before the Nov 4 general election and twice before the Dec 15 vote of the College of Electors — it would seem appropriate, if not necessary, for all Executive Branch departments and agencies to secure advance formal advice from the United States Department of Justice Office of Legal Counsel as to how to respond to expected inquiries from federal employees who are pledged to “support and defend the Constitution of the United States” as to whether they are governed by laws, regulations, orders and directives issued under Mr. Obama during such periods that said employees, by the weight of existing legal authority and prior to a decision by the Supreme Court, believe in good faith that Mr. Obama is not an Article II “natural born citizen”.
Moreover, each and every member of Congress should be notified that he or she is personally liable (can be sued) for his or her own failure, or the same in conspiracy with other members, to perform what is a ministerial and constitutional duty, that is, to require and/or insist that Presidential electoral votes only be counted for candidates who are “natural born citizens” under Article II of the United States Constitution, the failure of which creates a cause of action for deprivation of claimants’ constitutional rights (as allowed under the Bivens case) against employees of the Federal Government, in this case, to a lawful President and Commander in Chief, and therefore, for deprivation of adequate continuation of the United States as a Constitutional Republic. The constitutionally tortious conduct is not subject to congressional immunity and would be the jettison of Article II of the Constitution by failure to stop and/or object to the counting of electoral votes for Barack H. Obama who has admitted that at the time of his birth his father was a Kenyan/British citizen and not a citizen of the United States of America.
Finally, if 1/20/09 comes and goes with a usurper in the Whitehouse (that is, Obama is definitely NOT an Article II “natural born citizen” — dad Kenyan/British citizen at BHO’s birth — albeit he MAY be a 14th Amendment “citizen”) with usurper enablers in Congress and the Supreme Court … God help us because many of the people will — rightfully and under our Constitution and Declaration of Independence — endeavor through other means to take back the Government from what is nothing less than a non-constitutional coup d’etat. (SCOTUS now does have the power to forestall that grim yet inevitable scenario, otherwise the blood and possible loss of our Constitutional Republic is SQUARELY ON THEIR HEADS.)