Dear TelePrompTer People

Dear TelePrompTer People:

As I’m sure you are aware, one of the presidential candidates in this year’s election is inordinately fond of your product.  While most politicians, actors, spokespersons and others in the public eye have occasion to make use of your products, there are those rather informal situations where it is preferable to project a more impromptu image.  Let’s face it, sometimes a full TelePrompTer setup is impractical.

With that in mind, as well as the future of our country, I would like to suggest a few innovations you might consider.  First, perhaps a collaboration with Apple might develop a new “iProd” or “iProne,” a hand held device with multiple capabilities, allowing a user, say, a politician, to have immediate, discrete online access to answers from his campaign headquarters during small gatherings.  With such a device concealed in a breast pocket, and small, pocket-mirror sized screens placed discretely around the room, say, propped on the visor of an unsuspecting reporter’s baseball cap, such a politician need never be at a loss for an appropriate answer to an unexpected question.  The magnified TelePrompTer script, with the addition of remote scrolling capabilities and a speakerphone function make the “iProne” far superior to anything currently available to a harried politician on-the-go.

(*If the snooty Apple people don’t go for it, try the snooty BlackBerry people.  TeleBerry works just as well.)

Next, how about a marriage of TelePrompter and Ray Ban for fashionable question-and-answer assistance in stylish eyewear?  Mounted inside the lenses like small mirrors, TeleBanTer would likely sell itself.

The same would be true of a merger between the capacities of your product with those of a hearing aide. MiraclePrompt would be ideal when visual screen access is restricted.

Finally, one never knows when a presidential candidate might be called upon to engage in negotiations of a more intimate nature for the good of his country, like they do in those political spy thrillers.  On those occasions, proper equipment is a must.  For more intimate engagements, TeleBraTor would give Cyrano de Bergerac-style instruction, as well as spur-of-the-moment interrogation techniques to an intrepid lover/undercover operative, while distracting an unsuspecting, yet potentially suspicious and dangerous partner with heretofore unknown levels of pleasure.

Please feel free to further explore these suggestions as soon as possible, if you would.  No potential world-leader-wannabe dependent upon your products and services should ever be forced to face a hostile interview unprepared again.  As I said earlier, the future of the free world, nay, the entire universe, could depend on it.

Thank you.

PUMA

Just Say No Deal